scared about the hair

In less than 24 hours I have an appointment to get my hair cut real short, so that when it falls out, it isn’t such a demoralizing shock.  Except now……..I am getting a little anxious about this.  Gee….am I really going to lose my hair?  Maybe since I am only having Taxotere and Cytoxin as my chemo-concoction, the hair will “hang on”…… you suppose?  Maybe since I only had a few crappy days of side effects from chemo, I’ll be lucky about the hair, too.

Had no idea that I would be so anxious about this, and I am upset that something as superficial as hair is causing me this grief. 

But, on the other hand, losing the hair really kind of makes the whole “C” experience more real.  At least once a day, I look at myself and think, “wow, I still can’t believe this is happening to me.”    So.  Maybe doing the cropped cut is good, to force me to accept it all (of course the mastectomy went a long way in forcing “acceptance”  too.)

Then again….am I really gonna lose my hair??


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